Nastiest or Most Disturbing Flavor Text

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    As for the title of this thread, the Cursed may have a near monopoly on most of the unsavory flavor text.  Feel free to post your favorites that freak you out a bit!  (just realized Halloween is coming up too!)  Here is the Master Spreadsheet for reference. (flavor text is to the right of the Ability column)

    The Jikininki stands out, as it sounds like live cannibalism.

    When the crew of the Jikininki boards an enemy ship, they kill anyone they cannot put in their cookpots and eat.

    From Return to Savage Shores, Sskwa’aluk has long been one of the ones that made me think:

    Crewed entirely by Trogs, this foul vessel actually carries a coral nest beneath her hull. What lives within the nest is known only to the Trogs—and the captives who are lowered into the hull as food.

    Makes me think that some hideous immobile creature is shrieking and begging for food on a constant basis, perhaps spurring the Trogs so they themselves are not eaten.  O_O

    I’ve also always been fascinated by the small amount of flavor concerning “the loa”.

    Papa Doc discovered that he can possess both the dead and living, and he has set his gaze upon the purity that is Josephine Godiva. For if he makes her his one hundredth soul, he will have the power to take on the loa themselves.


    The DJC LE ships have some of my favorite pieces of flavor text, some which are horrifying on a psychological level, and others which are more blatant. Here are my top picks:


    “From the mists that gather at nightfall, the Howl appears with the scream of a thousand tormented souls.”


    “No one has seen the inside of the Crypt and lived.”


    “This ship’s name comes from the swaying of hanged sailors, who still move this ship along her dark course.”


    “This ship was banned from port because of rumor of plague. The screams of her dying crew can be heard for miles.”

    Black Gentleman 

    “No sane crew would ever sail on a ship named for the Devil, and yet she does sail, especially on moonless nights when no wind blows.”


    @MagExpress: Wow, I don’t think I had seen the flavor text for the Dance before.  O_O

    Jonathan Bowen

    Shall I assume that this is limited to WizKids pieces?


    Shall I assume that this is limited to WizKids pieces?

    I wasn’t thinking about customs when I posted it, but go ahead.  Makes it pretty easy to have a lot of nasty flavor text; some of mine is arguably offensive, but that’s what you get with a faction like The Cursed….

    Jonathan Bowen

    From Wizkids, a few come to mind…

    El Phantasma
    “Does a man seek the shadows or is he forced there by the machinations of others? Some whisper of a horrific betrayal, some of years spent isolated in a French prison, and others of unspeakable torture at the hands of the Moors. Whatever the truth, El Phantasma and his sepulchral crew do not intend to make amends for their crimes.”

    This particular text alludes to a darker origin story for El Fantasma than just, “He’s evil”. This touches upon the cruelty of mortal men, and what people do to each other without benefit of demonic powers or curses. And that’s why it’s one of the more disturbing to me.

    Another good example of this darker side of humanity is with Bloody Jake
    “Bloody Jake has no trouble taking orders from Havana Black. An accomplished master of torture with a variety of implements, he genuinely enjoys carrying out his captain’s commands—especially when it involves administering punishment or “encouraging” captured seamen to join Havana’s bloodthirsty crew.”

    The Banshee’s Wail is another good one
    “The Banshee’s Wail appears to sailors who have tasted the flesh of other humans. These desperate souls find they cannot harm the Banshee’s Wail, her horrible scream the last thing they hear before going mad.”

    That’s mostly it for a quick first look through. I’ll probably find more if I look again tomorrow.

    So on that note, I leave you all with the flavor texts that I find to be varying degrees of disturbing! 😀
    Sleep well tonight, everybody ?☠?



    Time for round two of my picks, mostly just runners-up from my last list. Here are the last few from DJC:


    El Fantasma’s new acquisition is composed of the bones of his victims. Each time a wave breaks over her bow, a thousand trapped souls scream in anguish.”

    That’s pretty friggin’ metal if you ask me. I wonder if OSHA (if it existed in the world and time of Pirates CSG) would require her crew to wear hearing protection…

    Mist Walker

    “Sailors who have seen Mist Walker—and they are rare indeed—claim that the beast doesn’t make a sound as it materializes out of the fog. The memory of their companions’ screams and torn bodies, though, will forever live in their minds.”

    Maybe this isn’t as creepy as other Cursed DJC flavor text, but it is reflective of its ability text, which I find neat.

    Now for the non-DJC picks:

    Scepter [CC 202]

    “Jack Jenkins breathed a sigh of relief as his ship narrowly escaped the clutches of El Fantasma and his ghostly crew. Little did he know that it was his last breath as a living man.”

    HMS London [CC 205]

    “The crew of the London had grand designs on the contents of the Deliverance’s hold, but rather than emptying it, they found themselves filling it—with their souls.”

    Turns out capturing a ghost ship is one of the worst ideas possible. Who would have thought?

    El San Salvador [CC 208]

    “Dead men tell no tales, and thus the mute crew of this ship cannot share the story of how they became damned to sail the Crimson Coast as spectral sailors.”

    Lastly, a crew:

    The Headhunter [SCS 041]

    “The Headhunter does not heed the call of civilization. His appearance—the human bones that hang from his neck and decorate his ship—and tribal crew put him in a different category of pirate: the soulless.”

    Maybe he isn’t as creepy-looking as any of the Cursed crew, but the Headhunter does have one thing about him that none of them have: he could have existed in real life. His flavor text (as well as his linked ship) also remind me of Kurtz from Heart of Darkness and Apocalypse Now.

    I probably could have added a few more from later sets (looking at you, Skin Flayer and Mourning Star), but I think I’ve contributed enough. This thread has given me the motivation to make the Cursed pieces from my custom set as horrifying as possible, so thanks for starting this discussion, Ben.








    • This reply was modified 1 year, 2 months ago by MagExpress.

    This thread has given me the motivation to make the Cursed pieces from my custom set as horrifying as possible, so thanks for starting this discussion, Ben.

    Cool!  The Executioner is definitely one of the nastiest.  The Cursed are the most numerous faction in my fantasy custom set.  Feel free to share your new customs in the prominent thread here.

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